.....Yesterday I drove to the VA Hospital by myself even though Rhoda volunteered. I didn't want her to give up her freedom for the day, and she made good use of it going to get her nails done and shopping for groceries at Publix. It's not a bad ride on the Florida Tpk; takes about 35 minutes and I get $19 travel pay every time I go there. PB asked for a health report, and so I shall oblige. I had to have blood work at 11am and then I saw my primary doctor at 2pm. I never had to have a wait like that at a VA facility. When I finally saw her we went over all my medication and she was very concerned about the fact that my liver enzymes were at least 10 times more than the normal and she wanted to put me in the hospital. At first I didn't understand that desire, but when I did, I asked why she wanted me in the hospital right away. She said that my liver enzymes had to be monitored or I would become in very serious condition. I told her I couldn't stay in the VA Hospital because my wife would not be able to make the trip back and forth in order to see me, as I assumed she would want to do; and secondly, I wanted to get a secondary opinion from my private primary doctor. So, that's the current situation with my health. I have to admit that I was shocked when Dr. Ducille told me she wanted me in the hospital RIGHT THEN! There was no way I was going to do that.
.....I'm beginning to think that the only sane people here are the one's who are writing the comments. I know I'm not. So the thing to read are their comments, not my blog. If you do that you will maintain your sanity; mine is under pressure. This past year was a horror; I could not prevent the things that happened to me. I had no control. Now, I have even less control. I am confessing to you that I take no joy in anything I do, and there are very few things that I can do. Foremost in the joyless category is the inability to help my wife even it's for the little things like emptying the garbage or cleaning the dishes from the table. I can't even walk the mall anymore to buy my wife a present. You can't do much with a scooter, but look like a damn fool. I have a dozen things that I would like to do but can't. And so where do you think that puts me? Read the comments; they define sanity.
My heart literally breaks for the plight of my dear friend who has courageously battled (and overcome) clinical depression for more than 60 years.
ReplyDeleteAs we've written before, Rabbi Ben Ezra was a liar. Growing old is an affliction and the alternative may be even worse. We are probably living in either Hell or Purgatory, with the latter being most likely.
GAUDEAMUS IGITUR! Since NR has always been a fighter, his greatest battle is to squeeze whatever joy he can out of a diminishing landscape. Only he can choose where to find pleasure or content under these difficult circumstances, but there are some obvious choices.
Since his mind is still functioning at a very high level, he could seek "Op Ed" opportunities. He has already been published in the local newspaper but his work is NY TIMES or VANITY FAIR quality. That avenue should definitely be followed.
Otherwise, there are the joys of family and friends. Your children have the warmest feelings towards you. They have their own lives to lead but contact with them should be pleasurable.
Because of your scholarly background and propensity for higher learning, literature should also be a source of enjoyment.
In addition, the achievement of conquering all obstacles to life should resonate with you. Le Chaim!
Norman, you have not mentioned the fact that you are tired, tired of fighting, tired of struggling, tired of being helpless. That excuse might be appropriate for a lesser entity but not for the Red Baron who is an ubermann. He must do everything he can to see the light and act accordingly. That is his duty and his destiny.
The Baron faces two menaces right now. First, the liver toxicity is very serious but curable. You are probably eating improperly which could set off a chain reaction.
Second, your balance leaves something to be desired. Do you have a GOOD physiatrist, a doctor who specializes in rehab and physical therapy? You certainly should never be alone; driving any distance solo is verboten.
Of course there are exceptions. It was necessary for you to drive to the VA hospital by yourself because Rhoda needed her nails done. Most men do not understand how important that procedure is to a woman, but you do.
Dear Norman, it is time to wake up and smell the hot chocolate. Let whatever time you have on Earth be as pleasant as possible. You are not as helpless as you perceive yourself to be. Your mission, whether you choose to accept it or not, is for the Lion to enjoy as much of the winter as he can. Go ye and do it, and confound the Devil.
Remember that the Baron may be caught in a web not of his own construction, may make mistakes, and may even be blind to reality, BUT HE NEVER FEELS SORRY FOR HIMSELF. AND HE CAN RECOVER.
Happy Kwanza to you, and to those who celebrate other holidays, HAPPY HANUKKAH and especially MERRY CHRISTMAS. To all, a happy, healthy, and prosperous NEW YEAR.
Poor Baron! You are very low in spirits and probably depressed: but that doesn't mean you're insane. You're unwell, that's for sure. And if a reliable doctor is worried about your liver, then maybe she's justifiably worried: so get your second opinion asap and act in accordance with it. Your worries about not being able to do things are a clear sign that you're very unhappy, at the very least: when someone is ill, they can't do all that they want to do, but getting worried about that instead of the primary health problem is a clear example of depressive thought processes. But the issues that are troubling you are secondary: the things you can't do must be put on the back burner while you devote your efforts to getting better. If hospital is what it's going to need, then hospital is what it'll have to be. I wouldn't expect my husband to go buying me prezzies if he weren't up to it: I'd want him to prioritise his recovery. And fyi, people on scooters don't look ridiculous: they just look as though they need a bit of technical help in getting around: what's the big deal? You're not the first and you won't be the last! Much love, Cuzzin Ruth
ReplyDeleteWalking around or scootering around with elevated liver enzymes is not good, and I hope you will not be doing it very long until your doctor in Delray has a chance to test them. Let us know right away when your doctor in Delray reviews the results, and if you must be hospitalized to get them under control, pack a bag and go.
ReplyDeleteAs another one of the sane commentators (although some people might argue the point), I must disagree with the Baron (at my peril, I know): Some of the horrible things that happened WERE preventable. The major events of the year were the cruise fall (broken hip) and the scooter accident -- they led to other problems such as the heal pain and skin cuts. If the Baron had someone assisting him in both cases, they were unlikely to have happened at all. Without getting into reasons why he was doing such things without help, we should instead concentrate on preventing such events from happening ever again. The Baron should have someone with him when he ventures out into the dangerous world. A bodyguard, so to speak.
ReplyDeleteI do agree with the Most Sane of All, Phil: Since the Baron's mind is still in its early 30's, it should be further engaged to make up for the other parts that have not proven to be as reliable. As Phil suggests, writing is one way. Another way is organizing more poker games. Not only do you not have to leave your own condo, not only is RH free to have her nails done, but you also will earn additional spending money on a constant basis. Full House!
Sound advice from both Cuz Ruth and the anonymous sane commentator. Your mission, Doc, and you MUST choose to accept it, is to maintain as much good health as possible and to enjoy whatever there is to be enjoyed. Those who care about you are confident that you can succeed.
ReplyDeleteIt is most annoying that the members of the Baron's local theater group do not utilize his enormous talent. If you've seen tapes of his performances, you know that he has the stage presence and acting ability of a major star plus a professional voice, and a sense of timing that is in Jack Benny's class.
ReplyDeleteIf I lived in that condo, I would insist that the theater lords put on THE MAN WHO CAME TO DINNER. Sheridan Whiteside, the lead character, is in a wheel chair for virtually the entire play.
The Doc could make the play a memorable theater evening for all who attend.
Unfortunately, Baron has been plagued by jealous associates for most of his professional life. That is a testament both to his ability and to the lack of character of his detractors.
The Red Baron IS The Man Who Came to Dinner.
Well, Baron, there you have it: ALL your trusted wellwishers are united in thinking that you should get another medical opinion on your liver soonest. You can do this at the same time as being depressed, trust me. When I'm ill with depression, it's true that I don't want to be at the doctor's. But then I don't want to be at home either. Or at Mount Everest or Victoria Falls or the Grand Canyon. Or anywhere else, noteworthy or not. I just don't want to BE. You might as well feel depressed in your doctor's waiting room as in any other location. Your liver will present the same readings no matter what your state of mind. So get to your doctor NOW!!! If your liver IS bad, try to get it better. If it's not, you won't get any sympathy from me about it!! So - re hepatic condition: PUT UP OR SHUT UP!!! But continuing sympathy for the depression - it's something I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy, let alone on someone whom I like and respect, ie, YOU!!! Much love, Cuzzin Ruth
ReplyDeleteVery anxious to hear about 2nd opinion. As others have said, this is a dangerous symptom, can/must be treated ASA).
ReplyDeletePlease make sure someone let's us know what's going on.
Got a message from my Mom RH+, I am happy to report it was not Barons Liver Enzymes, but an inflammation in his Gall Bladder. He will be released from the Hospital tomorrow(Thursday). Here's hoping he has a speedy recovery.
ReplyDeleteIf not supported by proper nutrition, the liver and the gall bladder are only two of the many organs that will begin to fail.
ReplyDeleteThe powerful drugs that Norman is taking have been prescribed to keep him healthy and alive. However, if not properly administered - that is, at the proper times and with the proper foods - their effects can be deadly.
He and Rhoda are fortunate in that they are intelligent, computer-savvy, and retired. They have a wealth of information at their fingertips and time to make proper nutrition a priority, if they choose.
As the Baron is not yet strong enough to write on his blog, here is the latest for his well-wishers:
ReplyDeleteDoc/Emperor/Dad has returned to the safety of his joyous home and is well enough to extort money from his fellow poker players tonight.
As previously written, the Great Man does not have a serious liver infection but rather an inflammation in his gall bladder. The treatment seems to have included cutting his meds; surgery is not indicated.
2011 was a tough year for Le Baron Rouge. We look forward to a much better 2012 as he follows a regimen that will assure his safety, best possible health, and happiness.
And, to all who read this, and even those who don't:
A HAPPY, HEALTHY, AND PROSPEROUS NEW YEAR!!!!
Baron: pretend I'm your mum. Now listen: "EAT, EAT, IT'S GOOD FOR YOU!" Seriously, even if you are suffering from loss of appetite due to depression, the nutritional value of the food you ingest will not be affected. I know from personal experience that it's hard work eating when you have no appetite, but it has to be done. Small nutritious snacks are the way forward here. Try a small slice of wholemeal toast with cream-cheese and honey.
ReplyDeleteJust caught up, thanks everyone for posting and keeping us out of the dark. Wishing for a better 2012 for The Baron and assuming he started off the year with money in his pocket from his poker winnings. Happy New Year to all!
ReplyDeleteI appreciate all of the sane comments; I wish every one of you the happiest of the New Year. I will get back to this blog as soon as I feel somewhat better than I do now.
ReplyDeleteI thank everyone for their comments regarding the Baron's health. I can assure you that, having worked in the medical field for the 20+ years we have been in Florida, I know the very good, not so good, bad, and all other Drs. in between. The Baron has an excellent group of Drs. taking care of him. Does he always listen to them, "no". Does he listen to me, not always, and then he gets into trouble. We'll take one day at a time and this problem will resolve itself. We'll have him healthy, happy and smiling again very quickly. We love you all.
ReplyDeleteDear Cuzzin Baron, I hate to have to state the obvious here, but if you are well enough to play AND WIN at poker, then you are well enough to post on your blog, ie TALK TO THOSE OF US WHO LOVE YOU!! Here's to your next posting!! Cuzzin Ruth xx
ReplyDeleteWhen I came home from the hospital, the last thing I wanted to do was to play poker. PB was just kidding, of course. I'm not yet ready for blogging...and not much else. I can't wait for my new mattress to be delivered Saturday. I'll probably have my meals on it.
ReplyDeleteOops! Sorry sorry sorreeeeee!!!! Cuzzin Ruth
ReplyDelete