Press 18 (Chai) for Yiddish

.....During the recent election, I went to our clubhouse where voting machines were set up for anyone who wished to vote--and in our community there were many who did so, and I was one of them.  When I got there and identified myself as a patriotic citizen who believes strongly in democracy, I was given a ballot and directed to a small booth where privacy prevailed,  When I opened the ballot, I was amazed to find that the instructions were in Spanish as well as in English.  Even on the ballot, itself, Spanish accompanied the nominee's names, so that any latino in our community who neglected to learn English could vote.  I looked around our very large ballroom and could find no one of that particular ethnic persuasion.  In fact, in all the 28 years that I've been living here, I never did meet or notice any Spanish speaking resident.  When I looked over the ballot, I couldn't help calling on my education to help me understand how  and where to make my mark.  I also could not help repeating to myself that we are an English speaking not a Spanish speaking nation. Everywhere I go, and everywhere I look, and everywhere I listen, I see and hear Spanish accompanying anything English.  Of course, anyone who tries to call a company on the phone is directed to "press one" for English, and sometimes I don't pay attention and I mistakenly press 2, and then I hear someone hablaing Espanol.

.....Perhaps I am wrong (not likely), but I don't believe a phone call in France, England, or Germany will direct the caller to press 2 for Shiite Islamic or 3 for Sunni Islamic.  There are 5 million Muslims in France, 3 million in Germany, and about 3 million in Britain--and Islamic immigration to these countries continues.  In France, alone, there are 1500 mosques.  According to a 2001 survey there were 1209 mosques in the United States.  

.....American visitors to Paris or other major French cities often are amazed when they see how the multiethnic way of life there resembles that in the United States.  But multiethnicity in France goes beyond that in the United States, for it includes a religious dimension in addition to racial and ethnic differences. If the most important minorities in the United States (the black and Hispanic) are overwhelmingly Christian, French minority groups are largely Muslim. American minority groups share many basic values with the rest of the country; in contrast, French minority groups tend to have alien values, to think of themselves as a new nation, and even to have hopes of superseding the present Judeo-Christian nation of France.  And don't think France isn't concerned about that possibility coming to fruition in the future.  As for us, I don't expect an invasion of Spanish forces led by Francisco Franco anytime soon.

.....Our country has had a history of ethnic immigrations--and I believe that if an immigrant wished to advance in American society he had to get an education, learn to speak English--and that is just what our parents and grandparents and great grandparents had to do.  And that is what they did.  

"Oh Brave New World that has such people in it!" (The Tempest)

.....This post might evolve into a discussion of a pot pourri of events in the last couple of days.  For instance, I tried to access my email yesterday and today in my usual way when I suddenly get an error message "Invalid URL".  I went to the Comcast "Chat" program and chatted with some i...ot who sent me all over my computer until I lost him and found myself back on my desktop with nowhere to go.  So, this morning I called Comcast and spoke to an i...becil who told me to go to "Internet Options" and delete my temp. internet and cookie files which I had already done a couple of times and which did not aid me in reaching my email.  I changed browsers from Chrome to Explorer and got the same error message.  So, I've given up.  I was able to get my email from Rho's laptop, and I imagine I may have to do that for awhile unless I get a techie here or switch to gmail or yahoo or hotmail.  What a pain!  I'm getting older by the minute, and I can't handle these d..mn glitches anymore!  I think it may be political and I'm being somehow punished for being a Democrat.  If there is a promise to me that there will be no more of these mysterious problems popping up out of nowhere for the rest of my life, I may give serious thought to switching allegiances.

.....Next: Yesterday, was the first "Showcase" of the new "season" here.  It's a show put on by the Theatre Arts class each month in the clubhouse ballroom.  The show consists of short skits, improvs, and monologues--dramatic and humorous--by class participants who have been studying their roles for a month.  My role in the class was as the "crtiquer" (sp?); a role I did not ask for, but to which I was appointed.  I also was asked to perform in the Showcase, and I recited the Seven Ages of Man monologue spoken by Jacques in Shakespeare's "As You Like It."  More people attended this Showcase than I expected--at least 100.  But after the beverages and cake and cookies during the intermission, about half the audience disappeared.  I imagine they all went to the restrooms and couldn't find their way back.   During intermission some lady I had never seen here before came up to me and asked if I were Norman Ross to which question I had no choice but to answer that I was indeed, he.  She said her name was Harriet Spiritous which rang a bell--she was my daughter Robin's baby sitter when we lived in the Bronx.  Harriet was 13 then, so I did not recognize her at age 73.  I thought this indeed was amazing.  She lived in the apartment right across the hall from us and we did socialize with her parents.  I was not about to ask her what happened to them.


.....Last night we had tickets to a show at "The New York Comedy Club."  Our neighbors joined us and I asked Gary, who drove, if he had directions to this place, and he proceeded to drive down 441 to Glades Rd. in Boca Raton and then went west.  He said to look for a Dunkin' Donuts and a Burger King.  Well, we went westeder and westeder until we got to the end...only darkness and residentials.  I told Gary that I was familiar with a place called the Comedy Club on Glades Rd. near the Florida Turnpike which was east of 441, not west.  So, sure enough we got to the right place after a Florida nightly tour.  It was 8:25 and the show was to start at 8:30 which it did not until 9:15 when a series of "comedians" came on stage--each with about a ten minute gig, and each with language more coarse and vulgar than another.  I couldn't understand why there was so much laughter, until I looked at the crowded house and didn't notice anyone else with a cane, besides me.  I couldn't understand a word except if they contained four letters or  referred to reproductive organs, but the members of the audience without bulging midsections appeared enthralled by it all.  And all the performers spoke so fast, I didn't realize that they were speaking English.  The language is really being changed by this young generation.  Speed of expression is the new mode, so that it resembles Chinese, where all our clothing is made; or Spanish which requires the numerals 1 and 2 to appear everywhere.  If this trend continues, the time will eventually arrive when no one will understand me.

"There's no business like show business like no business I know".

.....I just published a comment from "Emrys" which my readers may discover in the comments following the discussion about Mark Twain a couple of days ago. Emrys has been an admirer of my cuz Ruth from England, a veritable Encyclopedia Britannia, whose grey matter should be known as "Grimsley's Reference Work." And I'm fortunate to call her a family member. At any rate, Emrys touches base with Ms. Grimsley by "introducing" himself.  My "cuz" commented on the origin of Samuel Clemens' pen name, Mark Twain.  However, Emrys disagreed with Ruth's explanation and gave one of his own.  Reading them both over, however, it appeared to me that they were both saying the same thing in a different form of English; Ruth in "British" and Emry's in "American".  But the following is scientifically verifiable in "Twain" English: Mark maintained that his primary pen name came from his years working on Mississippi riverboats, where two fathoms, a depth indicating safe water for passage of boat, was measured on the sounding line. A fathom is a maritime unit of depth, equivalent to two yards (1.8 m); twain is an archaic term for "two". The riverboatman's cry was "mark twain" or, more fully, "...by the mark--twain," meaning "according to the mark [on the line], [the depth is] two [fathoms]; that is, the water is 12 feet deep and it is safe to pass.  However, Baron disagrees with all three of them--Grimsley, Emry, and Mark.  And thus in "Baron" English, the truth is that the name "mark twain" refers to a running bar tab that Twain would regularly incur while drinking at John Piper's saloon in Virginia City, Nevada. So, let's cut to the chase here, gang, and cut the academic pedagogics, and get down to basics.

......This morning I attended the auditions for the "in house" show scheduled for March. It's a show written by one of the residents--as is usual if we are not doing a "book" show (a wayoffbroadway revival).  The show is called "The Devil Made me do It" --a sort of senior "America loves talent" show.  It  has been a few years since I performed in "My Fair Lady" and I have not been able to slough off my thespian urges entirely.  So, I decided I would audition two songs--"As Time Goes By" and "If I Were a Rich Man".  I did "Rich Man" when I played Tevye about ten years ago; perhaps a little less.  I am not looking for a speaking part or anything else that would require my appearing for rehearsals several days a week at 9a.m. as I had in the past.  The gal who was evaluating the talent told me that I was the only one who received a "10"!  I guess I'm in.  And I'm sure that the "producer" wants me to do "Trouble", Harold Hill's litany against a pool table in River City.  I learned that million word monologue for "Music Man" --also many years ago, but I still remember all of it.   

.....I'm not sure that's a good thing???